Far South of I-10

I bought the airline tickets for our vacation yesterday. I had to modify my original plan, which was to fly to Rome, and take a commuter plane or a train to Paris. I waited on a call back from a travel agent though...almost too late as we crossed an invisible barrier between reasonable tickets and freakin expensive tickets. The rome tickets went from $700 to $1300 in a day...oh well, best laid plans and all. I went with the $650 tickets to Paris and pushed the buy button. I then made the mistake of calling continental to try and upgrade those tickets using miles....the agent didn't even laugh as she said "that'll be $450 plus 20000miles each way. per ticket. My brain's only response was to think "do I get a blowjob with that?" My mouth wisely stayed silent, since one of my employees was sitting 5 feet away. (my homerfication is almost complete: "hmmmm, blowjob") All I need now is about 8 different hotel reservations, some train tickets...

I'm traveling today and tomorrow, making a trip to Liberal, Kansas. Tornado country. Toto et al country. It's cold as heck here, I thought it would be springtime with wildflowers blooming, instead the snow covers the ground, and it's sleeting. A very sucky trip on a two engine propeller plane. It sucks to go somewhere that is only a few hundred miles from Houston, and it takes longer than it does to get to Europe. Not helped by having to turn around and return to Denver when some warning light lit. Oh well. The holiday inn has comedy central, so I got to see the darthifcation of Chef. Good lesson learned, don't piss off the writers of southpark.

The Scifi channel is showing the movie "The Day After", and I've paused in my channel surfing to revisit an event that I thought was a virtual certainty to happen when I was younger. In the new orleans of my youth, every couple of years they'd cycle through scare stories about the levees breaking, or back in the 70's and 80's they'd also cover the Soviets attacking. There'd be map of the city, with different range circles for different attacks...military only or if they attack population centers. Either way, our house seemed to be covered by the 'all dead' circle. Of course in New Orleans there is nary a cellar or basement, if we got hit we'd be, as they say in spanish, jodido. So better dead then red, was a chant, but with possibly deadly outcomes. And it seemed so certain to happen back then. Did that really happen? The people in Iran should watch this movie. Maybe I can buy them a copy on Amazon and send it to them. Maybe they...

Dennis the Peasant has a hilarious post , or at least hilarious in a sad, true to life way, on blogging for money. Since I've made some similar missteps that pissed away buckets of hard earned money, maybe I should continue my same methods and try blogging for cash. I missed the 80's, since I was still in school and had no money to piss away. But the 90's I pissed away enough money, especially at the end of the decade on etrade...I was gambling so much there (I mean investing) that they should have at least given me free drinks. Or as the peasant says: Now this time it might have all worked... except for that one last bit of bad luck. Things started out so well, after all. You took a large position in Hogs O’Million (a small pork rind factory in Grapevine, Texas) at $5.25 a share and then watched the stock soar to $100.50 on the basis of some hot news from a couple of internet stock picking sites. You have paper profits out the wazoo, and decide to celebrate your n...

I got a free trip to the rodeo last night. The company has a suite there at reliant stadium, and a friend had a spare ticket and some clients he wanted me to meet. Nice place, free food, free alchohol, just a little too high for my viewing pleasure...I spent most of the night watching the big screen monitors instead of the live action. I could have done that from home, just without the free food and alchohol. The other big benefit of the suite, and the reason it is called that is there is a bathroom in the suite. I started to walk out into the thronging mass of people to go find a bathroom somewhere, when I noticed the open door to our bathroom. Sweet! The rodeo action was pretty interesting. I didn't really know what is 'good' though, I had the same feeling I get when I watch hockey. Lots of fast action, but I can't really tell what the heck is going on. The part I liked best was the chuck wagon races, like nascar with horses. Or maybe more like the scene fr...

I've been vicariously enjoying Acidman's vacation down to Costa Rica, where he's been chasing women and living the relaxed beach lifestyle for the past few days. It used to be a dream of mine (or at least plan B) to twist off and head down to costa rica to open Joe's tequila bar on the beach. [twist off is an oilfield term for quiting, similar to how the drill pipe will sometimes break or "twist off"] Now, the A-man is posting that he spent the past couple of days sick with montazuma's revenge. I feel for him...I travel enough that I've had that same thing several times. I've found the best answer is not to use immodium unless you're on an airplane, just drink a thin soup of onions and salt...maybe it helps if it's made by a kindly woman... and you'll soon feel better. The immodium route just drags out the drama for a week or two. You're going to pay the toilet now, or pay it later. It's better to get it over with.

I used to read the NYtimes every morning, then flit over to CNN or maybe the local paper to see what was happening in the world. Now, after being steadily disgusted with various newspapers and tvnews, my only remaining morning ritual reads are James Lileks and Dilbert. (ok, so I'm not well informed, shoot me.) Today, Lileks' had the funniest morning bleat I've seen in a while. He always seems to capture small activities with the perfect verbage, today, he was really spot on when he bumbed into a childhood cartoon memory, I mean we're in Proust's cookie territory: The memory had been sitting in a combination of chemicals and sparky-juice somewhere in my head, and it reactivated with surprising force. It wasn’t so much the recognition of the picture as the feeling of familiarity, as if I’d just read the book the other day. The sensation collapses on itself almost immediately, and you can feel the present rush in, almost as if it’s too dangerous to keep this up....

One of my favorite business blogs is "Big Picture, Small Office" It's almost always wise and funny, and I almost always learn something when I visit there. He recently posted his "12 rules" when someone requested that he do so after he mentioned 4 of them in a post. Pretty good advice: .......................................................... To each, I gave a parting gift: twelve things to remember when put to the test. Atop the list: The Twelve Rules, neatly scribed and laminated, begin with what I believe is the fundamental basis for success in a senior management position and that is to remember what got you there in the first place: - Be not simply good. Be good for something. - Do not wish to be anything but what you are and try to be that perfectly. -Never poke a tiger with a short stick - Have more than you show. Speak less than you know. - Do not choose to be wrong for the sake of being different. - Think like a person of action. Ac...

I finally made it home this week, I got my chance to ride in the storm tossed seas, feel the fresh cool sea breeze, and puke my guts out until I strained so hard I reached that runny-nose weeping eyes point you normally don't reach until after commenting "I've never drunk this much tequila before". I knew it was going to be a rough ride when the crane operator looked visibly nervous about being able to set us down safely on the boat in the turbulant seas. He reviewed the procedure about three times, which is about 3 times more than anyone had ever discussed the procedure for getting onto a boat via personnel basket before. We were unloaded safely on the boat as the deck rolled sharply from side to side, and it seemed pretty rough, about a "7" on the "o-shit" scale. The captain didn't make me feel any better when he announced, "I hope y'all don't have dates tonight, it's too rough to go fast, we'll take about 12 hours to ge...

Here's a picture of the waves of a very rough gulf of mexico. It doesn't look very impressive, because I'm up on the rig taking pictures from 100' above the water. The waves are about 10-15' high, which isn't bad if you're 100' up, but if you're on a boat can be pretty miserable. Strangely enough, now is the rough season for the gulf, during hurricane season, except when there are hurricanes passing through, the gulf of mexico could be a big duck pond for all the wave action. Right now, winter winds blow, waves crash, all under a blue sky, and I sit waiting, unable to work until a boat can cross the storm tossed waters. Until I work I can't go home. Prisoner of the waves.

I've walked in circles quite a bit in my life. Offshore, one of the few ways to exercise (unless you're on a nice rig with a gym) is to walk on the helipad. Since the helipad is usually only 50' across, you're walking in a fairly tight circle, around and around. I was walking last night, and I wondered how many hours I've walked in circles on heliports, and could this explain my difficulty in walking more than 50' in a straight line after drinking 10 beers, or could there be another mysterious explanation. I guessed that since 1991 I've worked about 1500 days offshore (another 500 or so on land rigs), and I probably walked about 2/3's of those days, for an average time of an hour each time. That makes 1000 hours, or round it down to 40 days! Fuck. Oh well, my circular walk was spoiled by that thought. A wasted youth. On a cheerier note the sunset was a fiery cheeseball falling into the ocean in the west, and on the other side of the rig, two freighte...

The New York times has an article today about LA governor Blanco saying she won't allow the next lease sale if LA doesn't get more federal help. NEW ORLEANS, Feb. 7 — Seeking more money from Washington for hurricane relief, Gov. Kathleen Babineaux Blanco entered uncharted legal territory with a threat on Monday to block oil and gas leases worth hundreds of millions to the federal treasury unless the state received its "fair share" of the revenues. "It's time to play hardball, as I believe that's the only game Washington understands," Ms. Blanco said Monday night as she opened the second special legislative session she has called since Hurricanes Katrina and Rita.... Back in September last year I posted a similar idea, when I read that people were saying maybe it wasn't worth it to spend the money to rebuild Louisiana. Rebuilding New Orleans should be part of a comprehensive plan to restore the surrounding barrier islands and the delta, even ...

Sharon over at Domestic engineer pointed out in a post today that life is never boring, there is always something to do or watch that is interesting and something to write about. At first I thought to leap the self-pitying, "but I'm working offshore, and I'm bored" But then again she's right, people are pretty interesting if you watch them. It's always interesting offshore how people fall into stereotypes, mostly because almost all the jobs on the rig are pretty standardized, so you can call out on the PA on any rig in the world "pick up driller!" and the guy that does the drilling will pickup the phone. And he'll be pretty similar seeming to every driller on any rig in the world. Even in india, they are likely to be tobacco chewing rednecks. They just have curry for lunch instead of chicken fried steak. I've been on enough drilling rigs to have a definite groundhog day feeling (the movie, not the day). Things tend to endlessly repeat,...

So, I'm back offshore again. Here's a picture as the boat I'm on arrives at the rig after a lovely 7 hour jaunt through the wind and waves of the gulf of mexico. I didn't get sick though. My drammanine lasted until the last two hours, then I headed out for the back deck of the boat. As long as I can see the horizon and not smell the diesel/lysol/vomit smell inside the boat, I actually do ok on boat rides. Of course I'll never pay actual money for a cruise or to go fishing.

I got peeved when I saw a news article saying that the US supports muslims against the cartoonist in denmark, so I sent an email to Kay Bailey Hutchison, one of the two texas senators.: Dear Senator Hutchison, This is regarding the cartoons depicting mohammed in Denmark. Yahoo news has an article saying that the US supports muslims against the cartoonists. http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20060203/pl_nm/religion_cartoons_usa_dc "These cartoons are indeed offensive to the belief of Muslims," State Department spokesman Kurtis Cooper said in answer to a question. "We all fully recognize and respect freedom of the press and expression but it must be coupled with press responsibility. Inciting religious or ethnic hatreds in this manner is not acceptable." I don't think that the official US position should support people who are willing to threaten to kill cartoonists just because a cartoon depicts Mohammed. What else are muslims offended by? Women's rights. People...

Scott Adams is not only funny but makes a good point when he predicts that Hamas' policies will change now that they are in power: I have to think it will be difficult for Hamas to reconcile the whole “destroy Israel” platform with “We’ll all be at the Parliament building at noon talking about how to do it.”

I live near the gulf coast, so the idea of rising sea levels and hurricanes of increasing in intensity makes me think I should maybe be moving to Missouri or someplace. from PJM "Natural systems are resilient and bounce back," said Susan Cutter, a geographer with the University of South Carolina. "The problem is when we try to control nature, rather than letting her do what she does." The seas are rising, the planet is getting hotter and commercial and residential development is snowballing. Add those factors to a predicted increase in nasty hurricanes and what results is a recipe for potentially serious natural degradation, some say. "It may bring about a situation (in which) the change is so rapid, it's something that's very different from what the ecosystem experienced over the last three, four thousand years," said Kam-biu Liu, a Louisiana State University professor and hurricane paleoscientist. "We may be losing part of our beaches, we ma...

Doesn't it suck when you're super busy at work, but feeling so depressed that all I really feel like doing is sliding across the street to Big John's Icehouse across the street and tipping back about 15 beers. Instead I'll sit here trying to keep various balls juggled in the air, if too many fall and crash I'll ease on out with the walkin blues. Walking Blues I woke up this mornin' feelin' round for my shoes Know 'bout 'at I got these old walkin' blues, woke Up this mornin' feelin' round oh, for my shoes But you knoe 'bout 'at I got these old walkin; blues Lord I, feel like blowin' my woh-old lonesome home Got up this mornin', my little Ber- nice was gone, Lord I feel like blow-oon' my lonesome home Well, I got up this mornin' woh-all I had was gone Well-ah leave this morn' if I have to woh, ride the blind, ah, I've feel mistreated and I dont' mind dyin' Leavin' this morn', ah...

"It's time for us to rebuild a New Orleans, the one that should be a chocolate New Orleans. And I don't care what people are saying in Uptown or wherever they are. This city will be chocolate at the end of the day. This city will be a majority African-American city. It's the way God wants it to be. You can't have it no other way." New Orleans Mayor - C. Ray Nagin

Here in Alaska the governor is discussing a PR campaign would attempt to tell the rest of the US that Alaska is not just a consumer of Federal money, and it would "tell Alaska's story": (from a column by Beth Bragg) The governor wants to "tell Alaska's story" to the Lower 48 so folks down there have a better idea of what it's like up here. The goal is to end the ridicule we've been so good at inspiring lately, what with our bridges to you-know-where and our desire to drill for oil in a wildlife refuge. The thinking goes like this: If we can educate the critics with pictures of a desolate ANWR and defuse the comedians with pictures of a serene and congenial Ted Stevens, then we can move on to our ultimate goal, which is building bridges to you-know-where and drilling for oil in a wildlife refuge. Or as the Governor actually said: "Alaska does not just take. We give, and we have the capacity to give much, much more -- if permitted to do so,...